If Friday was my evening of sorrow, then Saturday was the dawn of my rage. I admit that I held out a sliver of hope that maybe the worst wouldn’t happen and I’d get a miracle. But the heartbreaking physical evidence was progressively showing the contrary. Boy, did I pace my room in a fury. One miscarriage: Okay. I endured it. I prayed through it. I learned from it. I wrote about it. I trusted the Lord on that ... View Post
Every Time :: Part 1
I have to confess that I’ve wondered something ever since suffering a miscarriage between my two girls. Is a miscarriage any easier the second time, like after you’ve had a healthy baby to redeem that season of pain? Essentially, once you’ve walked through that grief before, if you are unlucky enough to one day face it again, is the anguish as gut-wrenching, severe? Or just to get right down to it: If, say, we ... View Post
Peace from the Pieces
Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day. Literally last night I was cleaning out an old drawer and came across this treasure of mine: the puzzle piece I stumbled across on the ocean cliffs of Corona Del Mar while walking through the deepest grief of my miscarriage, the little life we lost between our two girls. This puzzle piece was a kiss from God, a promise, a signal of hope in my hour of sadness: ... View Post
On Getting Real, Getting Hugged & Getting Pregnant
It’s Thanksgiving morning and it’s early, Doug golfing and Emmy still sleeping. Today will be so much fun—creamed corn to make, desserts to bake, siblings in town to squeeze. Thanksgiving is one of my favorites. But this morning, I pause, because this year, I’m stunned to stillness with gratitude. Not only at God’s faithfulness, provision and grace, but at his whimsical, immaculate timing. It happens to be ... View Post
The Fault in Our Cars
Every Sunday night, my parents come over and babysit, and Doug and I go out on a date. It’s absolutely a highlight of our weeks and the perfect way to kick off each new one. Since it’s our one night to get out, snag some romance and reconnect without our favorite third wheel spinning around, we try to make it a rule that we do NOT discuss finances or family business items while out on these dates. Nothing kills a ... View Post
Good Grief: 10 Simple Things to Do for a Sad Friend
First of all, your incredibly loving messages, comments, emails, texts and calls the past few days have meant the absolute WORLD to me. You have no idea. I shared a very personal story and you responded with the greatest empathy and support. I’m so deeply touched, and I also feel touched on behalf of the millions and millions of women who have been in my shoes—especially the many of you who’ve reached out to me with ... View Post